The ex wife texted the bf yesterday, after he asked her for details of their daughter’s dance competition. Ex wife asked why and said that she wants the time with their daughter since last weekend was his weekend (never mind that she get her for the next 3 weekends due to travel!) and basically told him not to come. He was like “I don’t want to encroach on your time I just want to show up at the end and give her flowers and make her feel supported for all her hard work” and the ex wife told him that she doesn’t want to have to hang around him and me together because it’s uncomfortable (and yet she is the one who when we met and chatted one on one, told me she doesn’t want things to be uncomfortable if we were ever to show up in support of their daughter in performances or whatever!! She literally said that to me!), then she went on to say that it was also inappropriate for him to bring me to her parents’ house and to go around to their backyard.
First of all, on Saturday when we dropped their daughter off I just followed them out of the car and the bf could hear that everyone was in the backyard next door (the adjoining house is owned by their family as well) so he took her over to literally pick up his daughter and put her down on the other side of the locked gate (the grandma was there along with her sister) and the sister saw me I guess so was like “Hi!” and introduced herself, and then the grandma came over and shook my hand as well. Then we all said bye and that was it. I didn’t enter anything.
Secondly, on Sunday when we dropped her off I again followed them out of the car and just stood in the doorway to say bye to their daughter, and I waved at the ex wife. I was in the entryway for maybe 2 minutes – it’s not like I entered and then made myself at home!
So when I found out about all this I was suddenly really emotional – I really didn’t want anyone to be uncomfortable, and I felt terrible that I unintentionally made her feel that way. I called the bf and was crying, just saying that I felt so bad about it all. I’m sure their daughter told her mom all about her day and I’m also sure she told her a lot about how much fun we had together, so I know it’s somewhat stemmed from the jealousy, but still!
An hour later and now I’m just feeling annoyed and angry. The bf and I try to do everything by her rules and she gets mad at him for having me show up at their house? Like fine, next time I will stay in the damn car. I’ve decided I’m boycotting her and will even sit in the backseat so I don’t even have to make eye contact with her when we go to pick up their daughter. She’s the one who originally said she didn’t want things to be uncomfortable, and I really tried to reassure her that I didn’t want that either. I don’t want to be their daughter’s mom, she already has one! I just wanted us all to at least be able to be civil with each other and get along.
The good news is that all of this has made the bf even more adamant about taking the ex wife back to court to get at least 50% of time with their daughter, add a couple things to their agreement (which is implied even though the ex wife insists it isn’t), AND reduce child support. I’m all for it.
I’m so over her. She is being ridiculous. I don’t even want to see her anymore, or ever.
dating a dad blog 